Update Time March 2023

Well the stopping drinking and smoking did not go very well, sat here drinking and smoking weed.....

I do have the drinking back under control I am happy with one bottle a week and the weed is just for a few days as I needed to get some sleep as my  body has been hurting a lot.

I have had the pre opp assessment so just waiting for the op now, I have every thing ready its just a waiting game now, hope its soon as i want to go to the USA on the 19th November to stay with dusty for Thank's Giving.

Not been up to much the last few months, have started to read again so will have some thing to do after the op and i do enjoy reading, have played a bit of Serious Sam but am limited to the length of time i can play because of my left wrist.

I have a new friend, she is called Victoria and we met at a AA meeting,(I dont go to them now) she is 39 and very pretty and is a very nice person when she is sober but when she drinks to much she changes into a devil child and i find it very hard to be around her when she has drunk to much I am hoping that when I have my op she will stop the drinking and help me a bit. I am at a loss as to how best to help her, maybe i should start saying no to her (I did when i took her home tonight, she wanted to go to Mc D and i told her no...)it's getting harder to just sit and watch her waste her life, she has so much to offer, she can be so kind and sweet, until the drink. I often pray for her and for God to give me the wisdom to give her the right advice and help.

I told the hospitial that i have good help in place for when I get home and that my daughter will be spending the night with me, other wise the op will take longer as they would have to put a care package in place. Chery will be coming to me every mornings before work Sarah will pop in when she can so will April and I am sure there will be people from the church.

I just want the op done now, fed up with waiting, I know some things will be challenging and I am sure it will be easier than when I had the stroke, just need to remember to be patient and not lose my temper.That's why i will make sure I have some weed for after the op.

My mental health is pretty good at the moment have been taking Mirtazapine anti dep med for the last few months and found they have really helped me, I have always been against taking anti dep meds but on the advice of Lizzy my mental health nurse I tried them, have just cut the does in half as it should help my sleep, I am pretty happy with my mental health at the moment. The crap body and shoulder I will just have to put up with that at the moment, I need to help myself and start doing some stretching excersises.